My mother wrote the obituary. She left herself out. She left herself out!? She left herself out. She didn't want to, but she wasn't sure how we would feel about her being included. We insisted she include herself. She was married to my father for 21 years. I don't care if their marriage ended in divorce... she was a major part of his life and he was a major part of hers. Divorce cannot change that. That broke my heart that she would think she no longer deserved to be listed among those loved ones he's left behind.
I love my mother so much.
My mother and sister and I visited the cemetary. We still have to settle on where we want to bury him within that cemetary and will, of course, do that with my brother, but we've narrowed it down some.
My father's family wanted him buried in Ohio at the cemetary where his mother was buried. You know, that was really hard for us. My father loved his mother dearly. He was very close to her. But he was very close to us, too. And he chose to live here in Michigan. Even if we all move out of the state, this will still be home for us. We need him here.
I'm not sure if it's just that I'm getting tired of crying so much or that this is getting easier, but I feel a little more able to deal with everything than I did this morning. Of course, tomorrow morning may be another story. I'll be going with my mother and sister to the church I grew up in. That'll give us a chance to see people we haven't seen in a long time and deal with talking to a bunch of them all at once.
I'm exhausted. I can't think very well right now. And tomorrow, I'm sure, will be another long day. I need to go to sleep now.